Falling Apart
by lilgreenGremlin420
Summary: After circumstances out of her control, Wanda finds herself in a frightening position. She's gotten herself into a situation where she must work for not just her life, but another life as well.


**A/N: PLEASE READ!!! This is an excerpt of a story I'm thinking about writing, not a one-shot. If you like to read stories from the beginning, this isn't for you.**

**To give a little backstory:**

**After certain circumstances, the colony has moved from the caves to a boarding school like place. (The building was built by some paranoid millionaire who wanted to be ready for the end of the world after Roswell...school as a cover, yada yada) After even worse circumstances, Wanda becomes alienated and isolated from the humans, especially Ian who blames her for what occurred. In her "exile" Wanda discovers she is pregnant, (Ian's child of course) and in a mixture of fear and stupidity she decides to hide the pregnancy and run away (After the winter which is why she is there so long) before the baby is born. It doesn't go as planned, and the following is what occurs when the baby arrives. Rated mature to be safe for the birth scene (not extremely graphic) **

**Please let me know if I should publish the story. (All mapped out and ready to go!)**

**Disclamer: I do not own "The Host" or any of the characters or content associated with it. **

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It started at dinnertime around the end of February/early March.

I did my usual chores, making it through the back aches and hiding the cringes when the cramps occurred. I walked to dinner, completely exhausted and as usual…completely alone. By now I was used to the stares, beginning to grow in toleration but nowhere near ready to welcome me back with open arms.

Today had been trying, I'd spent most of the morning and part of the afternoon packing and unpacking the non-fiction books as I moved them from one side of the room to the other. Harry had been no help as usual, too engrossed in his Japanese comic books to lift a finger. I got so frustrated at some point that I found myself yelling at him to come and help, only for five seconds to go by before I tearfully apologized.

My emotions were so torn these days, a million times worse than they'd been when I was with Melanie. I constantly found myself falling apart at the stupidest things, or waves of anger suddenly appearing when I thought of something trivial. If Ian appeared anywhere, I left as fast as possible, scared to see which reaction I would emit.

I grabbed my soup from the line and sat down at the end of one of the wooden tables. I was early, people had just begun to trickle in so I resolved to finish as fast as I could and get to the showers first. The only problem was that I wasn't extremely hungry, so I ended up staring at the bowl in front of me for a few minutes debating what to do. I was startled as someone slid into the seat across from me.

"Hey, Wanda." Jaime said tentatively, reaching for the role he knew I wouldn't eat. "You and Christine fighting again?" I asked, looking across the room. Sure enough, the girl was glaring at the back of Jaime's inky black head. "Yeah." He said. "She's mad because Mel called her out during chores, and I refused to take her side. She'll be cooled off by tomorrow." He had a smirk as he chewed his bread.

"That's good, you wouldn't want to be marked traitor for too long." I moved the soup around with my spoon. The smell had begun to make me kind of nauseous, so I finally decided to not eat. Jaime sighed. "You know that if you stopped isolating yourself and at least tried, you might have more friends than just me and Harry….you okay?"

Actually I wasn't. My stomach had started to cramp again, but this time it waved through my back to my front to my legs. It hurt, just enough for me to wince and for Jaime to notice. "Yeah, fine." I said as I exhaled. "Just thinking about Harry as a friend, not really how I picture him." Jaime chuckled, "And how's that?" I stopped to think. "Colleague." Jaime shook his head, still chuckling. "Hey, there's Mel and Jared. I'm gonna go and see what's happening with them." He started to get up. "Nice talking to you, Wanda. We should do it _more…_don't be a such a stranger any more." I waved as he left to sit with his family.

I decided to follow his lead and leave as well. The table had begun to fill up, and I was still feeling ill. Not to mention the soup was cold now, and I doubted it was more appetizing then it had been when I got it. I walked to the garbage and dropped of my trash. Before I left, the pain hit me again and I grabbed the sides of the garbage can in surprise. It lasted only a minute, but I didn't miss the puzzled glances that Jaime and his group gave me as I left the cafeteria.

It was early but I went straight to bed, curling up in my night gown and covers. Whatever sleep I got was fitful, as I tossed and turned trying to relieve the cramping. As the pain started to come more rhythmic and worse, I caught on to what was happening.

Trying not to panic, I started to think about what I would do. Obviously I was unprepared, thinking I had a few more weeks to formulate an escape plan. I figured the baby would come in the room. I would throw some clothes together and then leave through one of the evacuation routes, taking a car. I'd drive into town and find a healing facility, making up some crazy story that they would surely believe.

When they gave us a clean bill of health I would drive us to a shuttle station. Then I was completely free and could go anywhere I wanted. No one would care that I was gone, they would look for me for a while making sure I hadn't exposed them. When they realized they were safe they would return to their life, loving the fact that I was gone. They would be relieved. Especially Ian.

The pain started to get worse and worse, and I kept thinking that any time I would feel the baby come. But it didn't, and as I found myself in constant pain, I would scream into my pillows, bite them, do any thing I could to somehow make it better.

I found myself wishing that I was a soul giving birth. At least I would die fast, my children born in an hour. And then at least then I would have had a choice.

When I thought the pain couldn't get any worse it did. It got worse and seemed to be constant. I was sure I would die anyway, human or not. I moaned into my pillow, gripping the sides of my bed. It shocked me how animalistic it all was with all the inhuman sounds coming from my body.

And then I felt the overwhelming need to go to the bathroom. I figured since I was going to die anyway, I'd rather not have them find my body covered in bodily excrement. I opened my door and slowly walked out. With the pain I found my self crawling on the ground down the hall. I stopped every now and then, putting my hand in my mouth trying every effort I could to stifle the noise.

I have no idea how I made it to the bathroom in time, but when I did I found myself suddenly too tired and weak to lift myself onto the toilet. I leaned up against the wall before sliding to lay on the ground. The pressure overwhelmed me and I cried out, giving into it. Fluid gushed from me, and I silently cried into the tile. So this was how it would end. In the morning, they would find my cold dead body on the tile, my child's fate the same because I couldn't live long enough to bring it into the world.

Faintly in the background I heard someone approach, but I didn't care anymore if I was discovered. I was too wrapped up in my pain and despair. Besides, it would be over soon. I looked up to see Jared. He was sleepy and confused, but he snapped awake when he noticed me curled up on the floor writhing in pain.

"Wanda, I though I heard a commotion? What's wrong?!" He knelt down and grabbed my shoulders. "I'm so-o-o-r-r-ry!" I sobbed. "Wanda, your bleeding." He said. Was I? I hadn't noticed, I didn't care. I was fading too fast. Then I was vaguely aware that he was gone, and what seemed like hours later Melanie appeared, shaken and frantic as she took in my appearance.

"Wanda!" She cried, running to me and laying my head in her arms. "Wanda, what's going on?!" I was barely there, engrossed in misery. I managed a hoarse "Dying" before relapsing into tears. "I'm so sorry, sorry sorry sorry!" I moaned. The pressure had built up so much. It was all my fault. I was so stupid! "Sorry about what?" Melanie shook me. "Why are you dying?" She was running her fingers through my sweaty hair. "I'm so sorry, sorry sorry, my baby, my baby, baby."

It was then she realized, and she took account the wetness between my legs. "Oh my God!" She gasped as she put together the puzzle pieces from tonight and the past months. "Oh my God!" She reiterated. "Wanda, why? How?" By now, I had closed my eyes letting it all swallow me. Waiting for it to take me.

Doc's voice entered.

"I'm here, how is she."

"She's having a baby."

"What?! How far apart are the contractions?"

"All the time I'm guessing."

"Has her water broken?"

"Look at the floor"

I heard Doc rustle around in his bag, and Melanie yelling at Jared. "Get on crowd control, no one needs to see this." I opened my eyes, Doc was pulling on gloves and Jared was at the door pushing back people I hadn't even registered.

Doc went to pull my legs apart. I shook my head, whining into Mel's lap.

"Wanda, I need to see." He said.

Reluctantly I obeyed.

"Baby's crowning." He said

"What's that mean?" Melanie cried

"It's coming now. There's no time to move her to the infirmary. Wanda, I need you to push. Melanie, prop her up more."Melanie had me lean onto her knees as she sat up grabbing my hands. "Push Wanda" She said "C'mon"

I gave into the pressure then, it was relieving to give in all the way. The next few moments passed quickly. It seemed like seconds later that what felt like a slimy vacuum sensation, and the end of the pressure occurred.

A blurr followed. Doc handing the baby to Melanie. Jared scooping me up. Pushing through a crowd. Jared saying that there was more blood. Lots more. And then a glimpse of a blundering confused figure with black hair and sleepy blue eyes standing in a door way before I fell into complete darkness.

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**A/N: So what do you think? A story worth telling all the way? Just don't want to start something that no one will read, this will be a fairly long story (like 50 chapters at the most) and I don't want to spend so much time on it if it just sits there. **

**Anyway, much love to you guys!!!**


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